How To Know You Are in An Abusive Relationship
Sometimes, we stay in abusive relationships without even having an iota of idea that we are in one. You know what they say about love being blind and (deaf and dumb) perhaps.
But it is usually safer if we spot that we are actually in an abusive relationship and take a step either to leave to live or stay let it see the end of us (you shouldn't be surprised to hear that a lot of people have died as a result of abuse, yeah?).
Abuse isn't only physical (like when he/she turns you into a punching bag and your home feels like a boxing ring). Abuse could come in form of emotional, verbal, or even sexual abuse and errrm... financial abuse, please. LOL.
Okay, let's say we are focusing on married people here (hello single fam, take a chill pill, Y'all will get there someday).
So...
Did you even know that there is a thing called marital rape? Like a scenario where a husband rapes his wife and vice versa? No, it is rape when the sex is not mutual.
Okay! before I bore you with long talks, let me just share with you 7 critical signs that point to the fact that you are in an abusive relationship:
Jealousy
As much as we have heard that jealousy is healthy for relationships, some are highly unhealthy and should be watched, lest it degenerates to something deadly.
Guilt-Trip
When a partner guilt-trips you into believing that every fault of the relationship is all your making, dearie, that is a glaring sign that you are in an abusive relationship.
Awkward Sex
Sex is meant to be enjoyed yeah? Even though some people love to be rough-handled in bed, some signs from your partner might not be geared towards giving you the maximum pleasure you desire. It could be a sign that you are being abused, but well, what do I know. I gave up on the fight when I heard a girl say she only gets in the mood when her man hits her so hard. Not the regular sexy-kinda hit. She meant something like some serious hot slaps here and there, hahaha. To each his own after all.
Lack of communication
I might be terrible at communicating with people but one thing I am sure of is that communication is the engine room of a relationship. What is a relationship without communication? Probably a boring ship. The 'Relation' in 'Relationship' was deliberately figured out by people who must have analysed what it takes to have a successful one.
So if your relationship lacks communication or your partner carries a long face for days that span into weeks and even months sometimes after an argument (which of course, spices up relationships), then you might be having an abusive relationship without knowing.
Pretence
Ah! There is nothing more repulsive than pretence even in our everyday lives. If your partner does not allow you to be yourself when you are together, then you should be very sure that the relationship is an abusive one. That is emotional abuse. You should be yourself in a relationship, that way, you will be able to make the most of it.
Errrmmm, I may not be a relationship expert but I bet I have a million and one things to talk about when it comes to that. Don't even ask me how. Or let's just say, I am a writer and I have been doing this for years. LOL.
Relationships are meant to bring out the best in us, but when you are not exuding your best, that could be a glaring sign that the relationship is abusive and may not be healthy for you.
So check it, fix it and become the best version of yourself.
Cheers!
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